JRE #2149 – Sebastian Maniscalco

10-May-24

[00:00:00.000 –> 00:00:27.980] My first time here now at the Austin property. Yes. And first of all, most comfortable chair
[00:00:27.980 –> 00:00:32.380] I’ve ever sat. They’re great, right? I don’t know. I feel like when I come here or when
[00:00:32.380 –> 00:00:37.980] I come through this podcast is my third time on it. I feel like I’m in the future. All right.
[00:00:37.980 –> 00:00:43.420] I feel like you got things that aren’t even out yet, right? I just feel like this chair,
[00:00:44.220 –> 00:00:48.860] the general public can’t even have access to it. No, but they do. We’ve had these for years.
[00:00:48.860 –> 00:00:56.940] Whatever they are. These are great. Then I feel like I’ve never drank water out of
[00:00:57.500 –> 00:00:59.900] metal cup. Yeah. We’re sustainable here.
[00:01:02.380 –> 00:01:07.260] I feel like there’s a reason for everything that you do, right? There’s definitely a reason for
[00:01:07.260 –> 00:01:12.300] metal cups. You really shouldn’t be drinking out of plastic. Okay. Yeah. Again, I mean, I do.
[00:01:12.300 –> 00:01:16.780] I drink a plastic water bottle. Someone gives you one, but I avoid them whenever I can.
[00:01:17.660 –> 00:01:24.300] Yeah. Of course we all know the plastics. When I’m drinking out of plastic bottles myself and
[00:01:24.380 –> 00:01:29.020] I don’t know. I don’t see that much of a… It’s going to turn you into a chick. No, maybe.
[00:01:32.380 –> 00:01:37.820] Is this even real water? What kind of water is this? It’s filtered water. Yeah. What is it like?
[00:01:38.380 –> 00:01:41.500] It’s a super filter. Some crazy filter. Definitely a special machine that’s
[00:01:41.500 –> 00:01:45.420] that you can’t even unplug that. Right? You can’t get this water outside this room.
[00:01:45.420 –> 00:01:50.540] You can’t get the water outside the room. It’s good water, right? It’s very delicious.
[00:01:51.100 –> 00:01:58.380] And then you got a whole… I don’t know if anybody’s ever talked about your area on your side
[00:01:58.380 –> 00:02:04.220] of the table. Yeah. There’s just so much shit going on over there. There’s tins.
[00:02:05.260 –> 00:02:11.180] A mammoth teeth. I got an arrowhead, a legit arrowhead. It’s probably 500,000 years old.
[00:02:11.660 –> 00:02:17.820] You got soil on your bookshelf out there. Yes.
[00:02:19.100 –> 00:02:25.340] I’ve never seen anybody jar soil before. Well, that was from a gentleman who runs White Oaks
[00:02:25.340 –> 00:02:32.780] Pastures. His name is Will Harris and he has this amazing farm. It’s a regenerative farm
[00:02:32.780 –> 00:02:41.260] and he gave us two pieces of soil. Was that Carl Barkin? He was a fight. He didn’t get enough
[00:02:41.260 –> 00:02:49.020] biting me this morning. Carl’s getting hard, dude. He bit my finger. That was a real yipe that I…
[00:02:49.020 –> 00:02:53.900] He bit me this morning. I was like, yo! Carl goes after you. Yeah, you went after me.
[00:02:53.900 –> 00:03:00.940] But anyway, that soil, one of them is a jar of regenerative soil, which means soil that
[00:03:00.940 –> 00:03:06.540] is how a farmer’s supposed to be run, where there’s manure and chickens and all the animals just
[00:03:06.540 –> 00:03:12.540] ruminate and they live off the land in a natural way. It’s a deep, rich dark soil. The other
[00:03:12.540 –> 00:03:18.380] soil, which is pale, that’s industrial soil. That’s soil that’s been used with industrial
[00:03:18.380 –> 00:03:23.740] fertilizers and the top soil’s dead and it’s just garbage, which is most of what we eat.
[00:03:24.700 –> 00:03:32.700] See, the difference between you and I is you actually remember what the soil does and what…
[00:03:32.700 –> 00:03:37.340] Somebody gave me soil? Somebody gave me soil? And you said you got soil? I guess, yeah. Somebody
[00:03:37.340 –> 00:03:43.100] gave me dirt and I would know the difference between the two. You see, the dark dirt is
[00:03:43.100 –> 00:03:47.100] the good dirt. That’s the real dirt. That’s how dirt’s supposed to look out in the wild.
[00:03:47.100 –> 00:03:52.540] That’s what we’re supposed to be eating food from. Mineral rich soil so you get healthy
[00:03:52.540 –> 00:03:58.620] vegetables, healthy animals. That’s beautiful that you have that on display. Yeah. And again,
[00:04:00.140 –> 00:04:09.500] coming and taking a tour of this place is inspiring. You make me want to spend money.
[00:04:10.220 –> 00:04:14.300] Yeah. He should spend money. You definitely should spend money because if you don’t spend
[00:04:14.300 –> 00:04:17.660] money, what’s the point in having it? I know. I wish I could get there but you…
[00:04:17.820 –> 00:04:21.260] Come on, bro. Look at that watch. You’re balling. Look at that thing. What is that?
[00:04:21.580 –> 00:04:26.060] My wife gave me this for… That’s a beautiful watch. What is that? It’s a Cartier watch for our wedding.
[00:04:26.060 –> 00:04:30.460] That’s gorgeous. Thank you. Let me see that. Let me look at it. Oh, that’s a pretty watch.
[00:04:30.460 –> 00:04:33.660] That is a lovely watch. Well, thank you, Joe. I appreciate it. Yeah.
[00:04:34.700 –> 00:04:38.300] She gave me this for our wedding gift. Very nice. But yeah, the watch got taste.
[00:04:38.300 –> 00:04:44.860] That’s obviously… She got… You had some bastard? She got a lot more taste than I do.
[00:04:44.860 –> 00:04:48.060] I tell you that right now. I know. Yeah, I let my wife pick up almost everything.
[00:04:48.060 –> 00:04:55.660] When I have nice sneakers on, it’s generally my wife bottom. Does your wife comment on your clothing?
[00:04:56.380 –> 00:05:01.740] She does but she leaves me alone for the most part. But she’ll dress me occasionally if I
[00:05:01.740 –> 00:05:05.900] have to go out. But I’m basically a fucking teenager. Yeah, well, yeah. I think I got a
[00:05:05.900 –> 00:05:10.700] T-shirt like a Jiu Jitsu T-shirt. Yay. I wear T-shirts. Yeah. They’re comfortable.
[00:05:10.860 –> 00:05:15.980] Our jeans, they’re comfortable. I don’t really give a fuck. I don’t think I’ve ever seen you in a
[00:05:15.980 –> 00:05:20.620] suit. I wear suits. Yeah. Yeah, I have some nice suits. I have David August made me a whole…
[00:05:20.620 –> 00:05:26.060] I have like a whole row in my office. I’m in my house, my closet filled with suits.
[00:05:26.780 –> 00:05:30.220] Yeah, I got a bunch of custom-made suits because I can’t wear regular suits. I don’t fit
[00:05:30.220 –> 00:05:37.100] in them. There’s only a 200 pound 5’8” dudes. Just very odd shaped. They don’t make clothing.
[00:05:38.060 –> 00:05:45.500] Chimp size suits. Short suits are really wide. Yeah. But it’s a nice fitted suit. It’s a fucking
[00:05:45.500 –> 00:05:49.420] wonderful thing to have because it just fits you perfectly. All the cuffs and everything.
[00:05:49.420 –> 00:05:56.460] You feel different, you put it on. We did a show in Vegas. We did the MGM, the Grand Garden
[00:05:56.460 –> 00:06:01.740] Arena. And we did me and Brian Simpson, Tony Hinchcliffe and Hans Kim. And I got them all
[00:06:01.740 –> 00:06:05.420] suits. I said let’s all get… Like, we’re doing Vegas. Come on, let’s do it rat pack
[00:06:05.420 –> 00:06:10.620] style. So we got some of these beautiful David August suits and Jamie got one too. It was incredible.
[00:06:10.620 –> 00:06:15.500] Nice. It was so much fun. Yeah. It’s nice. You wear… You feel different when you show up with a suit on.
[00:06:15.500 –> 00:06:20.460] You do feel different, however I… Look at that. That’s us. Oh yeah. Come on, son. That’s a nice…
[00:06:20.460 –> 00:06:25.660] Sharp. Shut. Sharp. Everybody’s looking sharp. Look at Jamie with the shades. Come on.
[00:06:26.780 –> 00:06:30.300] I’ve got the full pulp fiction ponytail going on. Look at you.
[00:06:31.020 –> 00:06:38.860] Nice, right? I feel though with a suit. Right? And I’ve noticed this as I’ve gained some weight
[00:06:38.860 –> 00:06:47.100] in the midsection. Wearing a suit is becoming extremely uncomfortable if you don’t have like a
[00:06:47.100 –> 00:06:55.740] very kind of tight body. Right. If you get stuck around here it binds you. Tuck in the shirt.
[00:06:56.300 –> 00:07:03.100] There’s the buttons. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So I’m fluctuating in my weight where the suits I got
[00:07:03.100 –> 00:07:08.620] right now I gotta work into them. Yeah. Well you and me are both Italian and Italians. We just love
[00:07:08.620 –> 00:07:13.740] our pasta. It’s a problem. It’s a problem. Especially when you… After you hit 50 it just seems to
[00:07:14.300 –> 00:07:19.500] not go away. It doesn’t go away. The only way to go away is to not eat pasta. That’s the
[00:07:19.500 –> 00:07:25.820] only way. It’s the only way for me. Not eat pasta and booze. If I cut way back on the booze and no
[00:07:25.820 –> 00:07:33.180] pasta my body just goes… And tribbles back to normal. Yeah, I’m in the process of trying to get back.
[00:07:33.180 –> 00:07:38.380] It’s so hard to avoid that food. The food is just like if it’s in front of me I just have a real
[00:07:38.380 –> 00:07:45.100] problem. Well you’re like to eat meat. Do you find that the meat is helping your
[00:07:45.740 –> 00:07:52.220] physique and… Yeah, if I just eat meat. Yeah, definitely. Yeah because meat is very satisfying.
[00:07:52.220 –> 00:07:57.340] Meat has what’s called a high satiety rate which means like when you eat it you get satisfied
[00:07:57.340 –> 00:08:01.340] when your body’s had enough. But I always say this like if you gave me a steak,
[00:08:02.300 –> 00:08:06.540] just a steak, 16 ounce steak, I eat it. I’m good. I don’t eat anything else. But if there’s
[00:08:06.540 –> 00:08:11.820] a bowl of pasta next to that steak I’m eating the pasta too. If there’s some bread and butter
[00:08:11.820 –> 00:08:15.340] I’m going to eat the bread and butter. Somebody rolls out dessert, of course I’ll have dessert.
[00:08:15.340 –> 00:08:21.580] Next thing you know I’ve consumed you know 1500 extra calories that I didn’t even really want or need.
[00:08:22.140 –> 00:08:31.180] They just get addicted to just stuffing your face. Just stuff. Oh, if I don’t leave like this like
[00:08:31.740 –> 00:08:37.020] oh like my stomach literally will just stand out where I look at myself in the mirror
[00:08:37.020 –> 00:08:43.660] I’m disgusted like what have you eaten? Look at all the mass you put in your body because if you
[00:08:43.660 –> 00:08:49.420] looked at like we keep your stomach like right here like this is normal my normal stomach but if you
[00:08:49.420 –> 00:08:56.300] add that much food which is I’ll consume that much food easy it just goes right here. Oh yeah
[00:08:56.300 –> 00:09:04.540] oh and you just look at like you fat piece of shit you lazy slovenly greedy fuck like
[00:09:04.540 –> 00:09:11.260] look what you’ve eaten. You get any uh you sweat at night when you sleep after you have made I’m
[00:09:11.260 –> 00:09:17.500] drenched. I have a thing called an eight-sleep mattress cover. I have one. They’re fucking
[00:09:17.500 –> 00:09:24.220] amazing okay to game changer. Okay so do you crank that thing up to 10 after you eat a meal like
[00:09:24.220 –> 00:09:29.900] that to cool off the body? No, generally if I’m sweating it’s because I’m having nightmares
[00:09:30.540 –> 00:09:34.540] you know I’ll have some nightmares and I’ll wake up drenched not in that thing though that thing
[00:09:34.540 –> 00:09:40.140] generally I don’t think I have woken up sweaty since I got it. It’s only I always used to wake
[00:09:40.140 –> 00:09:48.860] up sweaty. I wake up at wet sheets. Oh yeah no I eat a rib by two o’clock in the morning I get up
[00:09:48.860 –> 00:09:54.460] but I’m like sweating yeah and that never used to happen when I when I used to eat. I don’t
[00:09:54.540 –> 00:10:00.060] remember what I have the eight-sleep thing dialed into but I got it right there at the sweet spot.
[00:10:00.060 –> 00:10:06.060] I’ve tried it a little too cool a little too warm but now I got it right there. I sleep like a baby.
[00:10:06.060 –> 00:10:12.460] Do you have it heat up in the morning? In the morning? I think it does. I think it’s on some
[00:10:12.460 –> 00:10:17.740] sort of a cycle. I’m not exactly sure I don’t remember how I set it up but you could there’s
[00:10:17.740 –> 00:10:21.980] a bunch of different options that you can do and you can even have a different option for like
[00:10:21.980 –> 00:10:26.300] you or your wife if she likes it warmer or cooler. It’s nice. No it’s been a game changer for me.
[00:10:26.300 –> 00:10:32.700] It does make a big difference yeah but taking care of your sleep is I’ve really prioritized that
[00:10:32.700 –> 00:10:38.300] especially recently because you know owning the club and being out late and I was doing two shows
[00:10:38.300 –> 00:10:44.060] a night which is also a lot it was too much. I was doing six hours of comedy a week just
[00:10:44.060 –> 00:10:48.380] doing three nights just doing Tuesday Wednesday Thursday two shows a night but it was just
[00:10:48.380 –> 00:10:52.780] I was too tired. I was burnt out and I wasn’t getting the proper sleep because I’d get home
[00:10:53.660 –> 00:10:58.940] shows over you know like 12 30 or something like that I get home hanging out with the guys at the
[00:10:58.940 –> 00:11:05.420] club I’d get home at like 1 30 and then I start writing and so I write from 1 30 to like 4
[00:11:06.060 –> 00:11:11.100] and then I have to get up at 10 to work out and like this is too much. You’re writing material
[00:11:11.100 –> 00:11:18.380] in the in the dead of night. Yeah that’s why I write. Wow. Yeah I almost always find that I’m most
[00:11:18.380 –> 00:11:23.260] productive when everyone in my house is asleep so I don’t have to like dad you know I don’t have to
[00:11:23.260 –> 00:11:28.300] think about anything you know did you do this did you put that away does this where’s the thing
[00:11:28.300 –> 00:11:33.660] you know I don’t have to deal with anything the dogs asleep everybody’s cool I can just sit
[00:11:33.660 –> 00:11:38.380] in front of that fucking computer and think you know and that’s the only time that I have
[00:11:38.460 –> 00:11:44.780] like free reign in my house where there’s no one awake so I get my best and also I think you’re
[00:11:44.780 –> 00:11:50.620] jazzed up when you get off stage and if you just hold on to that like your brain is already kind
[00:11:50.620 –> 00:11:59.980] of in comedy mode your brain is already thinking. Yeah I for me I do a voice message I record the
[00:11:59.980 –> 00:12:05.100] set and I’ll listen to it afterwards but as far as like creating I mean I feel like after 10
[00:12:05.100 –> 00:12:10.300] o’clock the whole body shuts down and I got two small kids so maybe that’s why you know they’re
[00:12:10.300 –> 00:12:18.620] sure they’re early yeah but yeah I mean 9 30 10 there’s just and talk about the two shows I mean
[00:12:18.620 –> 00:12:24.060] I used to do two shows with my my eyes closed and now it’s like the second show it’s like hey
[00:12:24.860 –> 00:12:32.460] are you taking vitamins? I take supplements like you know multi vitamin I’m sure I don’t have
[00:12:32.460 –> 00:12:43.340] it dialed in as much as it should be but I just feel exhausted yeah I am tired yeah and I just
[00:12:43.340 –> 00:12:49.820] constantly have to have sips of caffeine throughout the day to stay alive that’s uh that’s where I’m
[00:12:49.820 –> 00:12:59.500] at you look like you wake up ready to go right I got this whole vision of of what your day
[00:12:59.500 –> 00:13:07.900] must look like you must spring out of bed and go give me it right I never I only talk about
[00:13:08.460 –> 00:13:14.620] not having a suit on I don’t think since I’ve known you I’ve seen you yawn
[00:13:16.940 –> 00:13:25.580] a kid bro you constantly look awake what is it the it’s health the water it’s all the above
[00:13:26.140 –> 00:13:33.020] supplements definitely that’s a big factor I take a lot of vitamins I take uh I take athletic greens
[00:13:33.020 –> 00:13:38.940] that’s one thing I take but I take a whole suite of different vitamins I take a bunch of different
[00:13:38.940 –> 00:13:49.980] things like vitamin D vitamin K2 but I take things for eyesight I take um just fish oil I take
[00:13:49.980 –> 00:13:56.460] creatine I take a lot of stuff okay yeah I took a I don’t know three or four vitamins once
[00:13:57.180 –> 00:14:04.300] I swallowed it with some water I coughed and a puff of white smoke came out of my mouth
[00:14:04.300 –> 00:14:11.580] fight about here yeah I think the body’s rejecting the violence it’s gotta be a slow process you
[00:14:11.580 –> 00:14:15.500] don’t want to dive right into the amount of vitamins the amount of vitamins I take is like
[00:14:15.500 –> 00:14:21.500] half of this coffee cup cheese every day all right yeah I’m taking a couple I have like a whole
[00:14:21.500 –> 00:14:26.060] cabinet it’s filled with supplements and I pull them out so when you travel what do you care
[00:14:26.060 –> 00:14:32.140] carry a suitcase of supplements I have a bag and in my bag most of the time when I travel
[00:14:32.140 –> 00:14:38.700] there’s a company called Pure Encapsulations and they make these packs like athletic pure pack
[00:14:38.700 –> 00:14:43.100] they’re great for travel very easy you don’t have to think about just rip open the pack
[00:14:43.100 –> 00:14:47.500] take those vitamins and you’re good so when I’m on the road generally you getting rid of Carl
[00:14:47.500 –> 00:14:54.380] is he too too rowdy he’s rowdy what’s a bite me he’s teething bite him how cute is that dog
[00:14:54.380 –> 00:14:58.780] he’s cute I just bought a dog I just got a dog what’d you get never never a dog owner really
[00:14:58.780 –> 00:15:03.420] life it’s the first time I’ve ever had a dog it’s a labradoodle and oh those are great dogs
[00:15:04.140 –> 00:15:09.100] extremely intelligent yeah but I don’t think it likes me what I don’t know he’s looking at me
[00:15:09.100 –> 00:15:16.940] like loves my wife loves my kids doesn’t like you I don’t know just it’s uh it’s not as excited to see
[00:15:16.940 –> 00:15:23.820] me as maybe my wife and kids really I’m just very perceptive on the maybe he wants to meet a man
[00:15:23.820 –> 00:15:29.420] is he the man of the house well he’s becoming the man does he have balls uh yeah well he keeps his
[00:15:29.420 –> 00:15:35.260] balls yeah don’t don’t no that’s what that’s what the one I think the dog trainer said just keep
[00:15:35.580 –> 00:15:41.900] yeah just the other whole idea is you don’t want unnecessary puppies right I agree don’t let your
[00:15:41.900 –> 00:15:47.260] dog breed but be with your fucking dog like but if you take your dog’s balls off now your dog doesn’t
[00:15:47.260 –> 00:15:52.780] have any testosterone anymore yeah they develop hip problems and joint problems they’re they’re tired
[00:15:52.780 –> 00:15:57.020] all the time just like a man if you take his balls away they become a eunuch that’s what you’re
[00:15:57.020 –> 00:16:01.980] doing to your dog okay it’s just I’ve seen people do it and they’re like oh my I wish I didn’t
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