JRE #161 – Bert Kreischer

Joe Rogan Experience #161 – Bert Kreischer

This episode of the Joe Rogan Experience features comedian Bert Kreischer, known for his energetic stand-up routines and wild, often unbelievable stories. The conversation takes a humorous and often shocking turn, diving into topics ranging from Kreischer’s father’s unfortunate “accidents” to his own experiences as a “party animal” and his encounters with the likes of Johnny Knoxville and Rachel Ray. Underlying themes of pushing boundaries, embracing absurdity, and the search for genuine connection emerge throughout the episode.

1. Bert’s Dad: A Chronic “Squirter”

The episode kicks off with Kreischer recounting a hilarious (and perhaps slightly embarrassing) story about his father, who had a history of “shitting his pants.” This seemingly bizarre anecdote sets the tone for the podcast, highlighting Kreischer’s ability to find humor in even the most unexpected situations. The story becomes a running gag throughout the conversation, revealing a deeply affectionate, though occasionally exasperated, relationship with his father. It also underscores Kreischer’s penchant for sharing personal and often shocking tales, a hallmark of his stand-up comedy.

• Kreischer’s father, in his 60s, “sheds his pants” in a Banana Republic store in Beverly Hills, prompting Kreischer to tell him to “just shit your pants, dad.”
• Kreischer’s father’s unfortunate “accidents” were a recurring theme in his 30s, often occurring during marathons, forcing him to seek refuge in orange groves.
• The story becomes a shared joke between Joe Rogan and Kreischer, showcasing their close bond and willingness to laugh at life’s absurdities.
• This anecdote reveals a sense of family dynamic, highlighting the often humorous, but occasionally chaotic, bonds between fathers and sons.

2. The Rolling Stone “Party Animal”

Kreischer shares his wild, “reality show famous” rise to notoriety after being dubbed the “Number 1 Party Animal in the Country” by Rolling Stone magazine in 1997. This segment provides a glimpse into Kreischer’s younger, wilder days, exploring his experiences with excessive partying, drug use, and the unexpected fame that followed. Kreischer’s candid portrayal of his past, with all its highs and lows, reveals a degree of self-awareness and a willingness to laugh at his own past mistakes.

• The Rolling Stone article catapulted Kreischer to local celebrity status, with people recognizing him in bars and buying him shots.
• Kreischer recounts encounters with NFL players who invited him to party, leading to him being roofied on multiple occasions.
• He details a bizarre night with Johnny Knoxville, where Knoxville passes out pills and lights a bong, culminating in Kreischer being offered “pharmaceutical heroin.”
• Kreischer’s honesty about his past indulgences reveals a sense of vulnerability and the human tendency to push boundaries, particularly in youth.

3. Jackass: A World of Pain and Laughter

Kreischer recounts his own experience on a show similar to “Jackass,” where he was involved in stunts involving a bull and a fake beer bottle. The discussion delves into the origins of “Jackass” and the enduring appeal of physical comedy, showcasing a shared appreciation for the genre, even as they acknowledge the potential dangers involved.

• Kreischer describes a “Jackass” -style show he did for six episodes, highlighting the similarities in the genre.
• He compares the physical comedy of “Jackass” to that of early silent film stars like Charlie Chaplin and Buster Keaton, underscoring the longevity of the form.
• Kreischer expresses his admiration for Johnny Knoxville’s commitment to the stunts, even as Knoxville has achieved movie star status.
• The discussion delves into the origins of the “Jackass” genre, tracing it back to the enduring fascination with physical humor.

4. The Piss-on-the-Table Incident

Kreischer recounts a hilarious and somewhat humiliating story of a drunken night at a Thanksgiving dinner where he urinated on his girlfriend’s dining room table. This segment highlights the dark humor and self-deprecation that Kreischer is known for, offering a hilarious and relatable depiction of the consequences of excessive alcohol consumption.

• Kreischer blacked out and woke up to accusations that he had urinated on the table. He initially denies it, but later remembers the incident.
• The story highlights Kreischer’s tendency to push boundaries and engage in outlandish behavior, often fueled by alcohol.
• The anecdote underscores the humorous, and occasionally cringe-worthy, consequences of excessive alcohol consumption.
• Kreischer’s willingness to share this embarrassing story reveals a sense of vulnerability and humor about his own fallibility.

5. The “Party Squirrel” Tattoo

Kreischer discusses his contemplation of getting a “Party Squirrel” tattoo, revealing his penchant for quirky, humorous tattoos. The conversation explores the impact of tattoos on identity, and the potential consequences of having a “Party Squirrel” tattoo in a world where appearances can influence perceptions.

• Kreischer describes his tattoo idea, which is a squirrel holding a beer can and cigarette, further cementing his reputation as a “party animal.”
• The conversation explores the potential social consequences of having a “Party Squirrel” tattoo, highlighting the way tattoos can influence how people are perceived.
• Kreischer’s humor about the potential consequences of the tattoo reveals his self-awareness and willingness to laugh at himself.
• This segment delves into the cultural significance of tattoos and their power to communicate identity and personality.

6. The “Drunk Eddie” Incident

Kreischer recounts a story about his friend, Eddie Bravo, who, after a night of heavy drinking, took Kreischer’s car to the airport and ended up sleeping in the backseat, missing his flight. The anecdote explores the humorous consequences of excessive alcohol consumption and the chaotic events that can unfold when someone loses control.

• Kreischer describes Bravo’s blackout, which led him to take Kreischer’s car to the airport, despite not being aware of his actions.
• Kreischer expresses amusement at the absurdity of the situation, highlighting the unexpected outcomes of excessive drinking.
• The story reveals the close bond between Kreischer and Bravo, underlining their willingness to laugh at their own past mistakes.
• The anecdote explores the human tendency to make irrational decisions when under the influence of alcohol.

7. The “Death Wish” of Extreme Sports

Kreischer shares his own experience skydiving and discusses the allure and danger of extreme sports. The conversation dives into the psychological motivations behind these risky activities, exploring the desire for adrenaline, the pursuit of pushing boundaries, and the potential consequences of a miscalculation.

• Kreischer recounts his decision to skydive after researching the statistics and finding a high mortality rate.
• He describes the feeling of exhilaration and fear that he experienced during the jump.
• Kreischer shares his fascination with extreme athletes, such as the man in a squirrel suit who jumps off cliffs, highlighting the desire to push limits and experience adrenaline.
• The discussion explores the psychological risks and rewards of extreme sports, emphasizing the potential for danger and the enduring human desire for thrill.

8. The “Charity Pussy”

Kreischer talks about his father’s recovery from a blood infection, reflecting on the fragility of life and the importance of enjoying the present moment. This segment offers a more introspective side of Kreischer, acknowledging the seriousness of his father’s illness and the realization that life is finite.

• Kreischer expresses relief and gratitude for his father’s recovery from a serious blood infection.
• The discussion leads to a contemplation of mortality and the importance of cherishing the present moment.
• Kreischer acknowledges the potential for a shift in priorities and perspective after experiencing a near-death experience.
• The segment highlights the human capacity for growth and change, even in the face of difficult circumstances.

9. The Allure and Perils of Alcohol

Kreischer discusses his decision to cut back on alcohol consumption, acknowledging its detrimental effects on the body and its ability to cloud judgment. The conversation delves into the complexities of alcohol addiction, the challenges of moderation, and the allure of a “good night out.”

• Kreischer highlights the physical and mental toll that alcohol takes on the body, leading him to limit his consumption.
• He discusses the psychological factors that contribute to addiction, particularly the cycle of craving and withdrawal.
• Kreischer acknowledges the social and cultural pressures that often encourage excessive alcohol consumption.
• This segment explores the delicate balance between enjoying social life and maintaining physical and mental health.

10. The Power of Weed

Kreischer explains his belief that marijuana can foster humility and introspection, offering a unique perspective on the drug’s effects. He advocates for the legalization of marijuana and criticizes the criminalization of a plant that he sees as having positive benefits.

• Kreischer suggests that marijuana can lead to a sense of wonder and a deeper understanding of mortality.
• He argues that marijuana is not inherently harmful and that its criminalization is driven by corporate interests.
• Kreischer’s perspective on marijuana reveals a unique philosophy about the drug’s potential benefits.
• This segment touches on the ongoing debate surrounding marijuana legalization and its potential societal implications.

11. The “Warlord” Fantasy

Kreischer and Joe Rogan imagine what life would be like if they were warlords in a small, self-governing community. This segment reveals a playful and thought-provoking exploration of power, leadership, and societal structures.

• Kreischer and Rogan imagine themselves as warlords, leading a small community in a hypothetical “Bert World.”
• They debate the ideal size and structure of the community, highlighting the challenges of governing and the potential for conflict.
• The conversation delves into the roles of leadership and the importance of fostering a sense of community.
• This segment explores the human fascination with power and the allure of creating a utopian society.

12. The “Caveman” Gang

Kreischer recounts his experiences with the “Caveman” gang in his high school days, revealing a youthful fascination with gangs and the desire to be seen as tough. He also shares the story of his first punch, highlighting the unexpected ways in which violence can erupt in seemingly ordinary situations.

• Kreischer describes the “Caveman” gang, a group of kids from the public school who often clashed with students from his Jesuit school.
• He shares the story of his first punch, which occurred during a fight involving a “Caveman” and a group of black students.
• The anecdote explores the complexities of gang culture and the potential for violence that can arise from seemingly harmless encounters.
• Kreischer’s honest portrayal of his own youthful mistakes reveals a sense of self-awareness and a willingness to laugh at his own past behavior.

13. The “Degenerate Gambler”

Kreischer shares his observations about “degenerate gamblers” at the horse track, offering a glimpse into the world of compulsive gambling. The conversation explores the human tendency to chase a thrill, even at the expense of personal well-being.

• Kreischer discusses his observations of gamblers at the horse track, highlighting the intensity of their desire to win.
• He suggests that compulsive gambling often stems from a desire for adrenaline and a craving for a thrill.
• The conversation explores the potential for addiction and the detrimental effects that gambling can have on individuals and families.
• This segment delves into the psychology of gambling and the allure of a quick win.

14. The “Ghost Nipple”

Kreischer discusses his observations of “ghost nipples,” referring to the absence of a nipple on a woman’s breast after a mastectomy. The conversation delves into the human body’s imperfections and the challenges of coming to terms with physical changes.

• Kreischer describes the concept of a “ghost nipple,” using humorous language to address a sensitive topic.
• He acknowledges the challenges of adapting to physical changes, particularly after a medical procedure.
• The conversation explores the complexities of beauty and body image, highlighting the human need for acceptance and understanding.
• This segment offers a raw and relatable exploration of the human body’s imperfections and the need for compassion and empathy.

15. The Power of the Machine

Kreischer’s fans often chant “The Machine” at his shows, referring to his reputation as a “party animal.” The conversation explores the impact of fan culture and the way it shapes an artist’s identity.

• Kreischer’s fans regularly chant “The Machine” at his shows, creating a unique and recognizable fan culture.
• The chant highlights Kreischer’s persona as a “party animal,” cementing his image in the public eye.
• The conversation explores the role of fans in shaping an artist’s identity and the power of fan culture to create a sense of community.
• This segment explores the relationship between artists and their fans, and the way that fan interaction can influence both creativity and public perception.

16. The “Machine in the Man Cave”

Kreischer and Joe Rogan discuss the potential for Kreischer to start his own podcast, “The Machine in the Man Cave.” The conversation explores the accessibility and influence of podcasting and the potential for a comedian to connect with audiences on a more intimate level.

• Kreischer and Rogan discuss the idea of Kreischer starting his own podcast, “The Machine in the Man Cave.”
• The conversation highlights the increasing popularity of podcasting and its ability to reach audiences directly.
• Kreischer’s potential podcast underscores the shift in media consumption and the growing influence of online content.
• This segment explores the future of comedy and the potential for artists to build direct relationships with their fans through digital platforms.

17. The “Desk Squad”

Kreischer and Joe Rogan discuss the origin of the “Desk Squad” name, a playful term used to describe their podcasting team. The conversation underscores the importance of camaraderie and shared humor in the creative process.

• Kreischer and Rogan explain the origin of the “Desk Squad” name, a term that emerged organically from their podcasting sessions.
• The name highlights their playful and collaborative approach to podcasting, emphasizing the importance of having fun while creating content.
• The conversation explores the dynamics of teamwork and the unique bonds that develop between people who work together creatively.
• This segment reveals the importance of humor and camaraderie in fostering a positive and productive work environment.

18. The “Pika” Video

Kreischer and Joe Rogan discuss a viral video featuring a “Pika,” a derogatory term for Irish Travellers, who is confronted by a group of British teenagers. The conversation explores the complexities of cultural stereotypes and the potential for conflict and misunderstandings based on prejudice.

• Kreischer and Rogan discuss a viral video depicting a conflict between a “Pika” and British teenagers.
• The conversation touches on the stereotypes and prejudice associated with Irish Travellers, highlighting the potential for discrimination and social exclusion.
• The segment underscores the dangers of cultural misunderstandings and the importance of challenging prejudice.
• This segment explores the complex dynamics of cultural identity and the need for empathy and understanding in a diverse world.

19. The “Tracy Morgan” Story

Kreischer addresses the controversy surrounding a story he shared with his friend, Jay Moore, that Moore later recounted on stage as his own. The conversation delves into the complexities of storytelling, the importance of respecting personal boundaries, and the ethical considerations involved in using someone else’s experiences for comedic material.

• Kreischer expresses his discomfort with Moore telling a story he had originally shared, highlighting the potential for harm when personal experiences are appropriated without consent.
• The conversation explores the fine line between borrowing from personal experiences for comedic material and respecting boundaries.
• Kreischer acknowledges his own role in the situation, admitting that he should have spoken up sooner about his discomfort with Moore’s retelling of the story.
• This segment underscores the importance of ethical storytelling and the need for honesty and transparency in creative expression.

20. The “Machine” Legacy

The episode concludes with Kreischer and Rogan reflecting on the impact of “The Machine” persona and the way it has resonated with fans. The conversation highlights the importance of embracing one’s true self, even if it means pushing boundaries and defying expectations.

• Kreischer and Rogan discuss the enduring legacy of “The Machine,” highlighting the way the persona has become part of his public image.
• The conversation explores the power of authenticity and the importance of staying true to one’s self, even in the face of societal pressures.
• Kreischer’s journey from “party animal” to successful comedian underscores the importance of embracing one’s flaws and imperfections.
• This segment emphasizes the importance of finding humor in life’s challenges and using creativity to express one’s unique perspective.

5 Memorable Quotes:

• “Just shit your pants, dad.” – Kreischer’s hilarious response to his father’s predicament in the Beverly Hills Banana Republic.
• “I’m not gonna be some lush who who you see on stage and all he does is slur his words and lays down on the stage.” – Kreischer’s commitment to maintaining his professionalism and avoiding the pitfalls of alcohol addiction.
• “We are in fact just 1 part of a universe. It’s above our head. We There’s no there’s no actual ending to any of it and it just goes and we’re a part of it and we’re floating in it and we’re only here for a little bit. And we don’t know what we’re doing.” – Kreischer’s insightful reflection on the existential nature of life, fueled by marijuana.
• “If you’re listening and you are thinking to yourself, I’m not happy with my chick, Fucking change that shit.” – Kreischer’s empowering advice for those seeking a better romantic life.
• “You gotta piss on a dining room table every now and then. Fuck it, shit’s gotta good.” – Kreischer’s humorous take on embracing life’s absurdities and pushing boundaries.