JRE #305 – Bert Kreischer

1/2/2013






Joe Rogan Experience Podcast #305 – Bert Kreischer Topics

Joe Rogan Experience Podcast #305 – Bert Kreischer Topics

This episode features Joe Rogan in conversation with comedian Bert Kreischer. The podcast covers a wide range of topics, from personal anecdotes and comedic routines to philosophical discussions about life, relationships, and the nature of reality.

Major Topics

  1. Ting Mobile Service:
    • Joe and Bert discuss the benefits of Ting’s contract-free cell phone service, highlighting its ethical pricing structure and Sprint network.
    • They highlight the frustration with traditional cell phone contracts and the hidden costs associated with them.
    • Ting’s transparent billing system allows users to track their usage and costs in real-time.
    • The podcast promotes Ting as a non-evil alternative to other cell phone providers.
  2. Android Operating System:
    • Bert expresses his initial difficulty in navigating the Android operating system, particularly with notifications.
    • Joe assures him that the Android system is user-friendly once you become familiar with it.
    • The discussion highlights the cultural divide between iPhone and Android users.
    • They poke fun at the quirks and unique features of the Android operating system.
  3. Onnit Supplements:
    • Joe plugs Onnit supplements, emphasizing their effectiveness and ethical business practices.
    • He promotes Onnit’s products, including Alpha Brain, Shroom Tech Sport, and New Mood, touting their benefits for focus, energy, and mood regulation.
    • The podcast encourages listeners to visit Onnit.com and use the code “Rogan” for a 10% discount.
    • The discussion delves into the importance of healthy living and the role of supplements in optimizing well-being.
  4. Bulletproof Coffee:
    • Joe and Bert discuss Bulletproof Coffee, a popular biohacking beverage that claims to boost energy and focus.
    • They highlight its mold-free properties and potential benefits for adrenal health.
    • The discussion raises questions about the science behind Bulletproof Coffee and its potential drawbacks.
    • The conversation touches on the broader topic of biohacking and its potential to optimize human performance.
  5. Killer Bee Honey:
    • Bert promotes Onnit’s Killer Bee Honey, highlighting its gangster appeal and the dangerous nature of beekeeping.
    • The discussion delves into the history of Africanized killer bees and their aggressive nature.
    • They humorously discuss the risks and challenges of beekeeping, emphasizing the importance of safety precautions.
    • The conversation touches on the role of bees in pollination and their importance to the ecosystem.
  6. Slacklining:
    • Bert explains slacklining, a popular outdoor activity that involves walking on a tightrope-like strap.
    • He emphasizes its benefits for balance and coordination, sharing a story about his daughters’ improved ice skating skills after practicing slacklining.
    • The discussion delves into the popularity of slacklining in outdoor recreation and fitness communities.
    • They humorously discuss the potential challenges and risks associated with slacklining.
  7. Paddleboarding:
    • Bert shares his experience with paddleboarding, highlighting the challenges and potential for injury.
    • He discusses the difficulty of balancing on the paddleboard, emphasizing the need for physical coordination and strength.
    • The conversation touches on the popularity of paddleboarding as a water sport and its potential for relaxation and enjoyment.
    • They humorously reminisce about Joe’s paddleboarding mishap that resulted in a broken foot.
  8. Cheeseburgers and Healthy Eating:
    • Joe and Bert discuss the conflicting desires for healthy eating and indulging in unhealthy foods like cheeseburgers.
    • They acknowledge the pleasure derived from eating unhealthy food but also the potential negative consequences for their health.
    • The conversation encourages listeners to find balance in their diet, emphasizing the importance of nourishing their bodies with healthy foods.
    • They humorously discuss the challenges of resisting temptation and the guilt associated with indulging in unhealthy foods.
  9. Oprah Winfrey:
    • Joe and Bert express their admiration for Oprah Winfrey, emphasizing her positive influence and philanthropic efforts.
    • They discuss Oprah’s unwavering positivity and her commitment to promoting healthy living and social change.
    • The conversation touches on the cultural impact of Oprah’s media empire and her role as a powerful figure in American society.
    • They humorously speculate about Oprah’s personal life and her appeal to a wide audience.
  10. Lesbian Sexuality and Relationships:
    • The conversation delves into the complexities of lesbian sexuality, challenging traditional assumptions and stereotypes.
    • Joe and Bert discuss the notion of “turning” lesbians, highlighting the misconception that they are only attracted to women because they haven’t found the right man.
    • They acknowledge the diversity of experiences within the LGBTQ+ community, emphasizing the importance of respect and understanding.
    • The conversation touches on the societal pressures and expectations placed on both men and women in their relationships, regardless of sexual orientation.
  11. MMA Training and Sparring:
    • Joe and Bert discuss the importance of proper training methods in MMA, particularly regarding sparring.
    • They emphasize the need for controlled sparring to avoid unnecessary brain trauma and promote skill development.
    • The conversation delves into the differences in sparring techniques between kickboxing and jujitsu, highlighting the potential dangers of full-contact sparring in kickboxing.
    • They highlight the importance of building respect and trust between sparring partners to ensure safety and enhance learning.
  12. Brain Trauma and Concussions in MMA:
    • Joe and Bert discuss the long-term health risks associated with repeated concussions in MMA, particularly regarding brain damage.
    • They highlight the importance of recognizing the potential consequences of brain trauma and promoting safer training practices.
    • The conversation touches on the ongoing debate about the long-term effects of contact sports and the responsibility of athletes and organizations to protect their well-being.
    • They share stories about notable MMA fighters who have suffered from brain injuries, emphasizing the seriousness of the issue.
  13. Celebrity Culture and Douchebags:
    • Joe and Bert discuss the phenomenon of celebrity douchebags, questioning the entitlement and disrespect often exhibited by some famous individuals.
    • They emphasize the importance of humility and respect, particularly given the privilege associated with celebrity status.
    • The conversation delves into the pressures and temptations faced by celebrities, acknowledging the potential for egotism and bad behavior.
    • They share stories about encounters with celebrities who have exhibited both positive and negative traits, highlighting the complexities of celebrity culture.
  14. The Importance of Humility:
    • Joe and Bert discuss the importance of humility, highlighting the need to recognize our own limitations and the value of learning from others.
    • They share stories about how humility has played a crucial role in their own personal and professional development, emphasizing the benefits of being open to feedback and advice.
    • The conversation touches on the dangers of ego and arrogance, emphasizing the importance of staying grounded and avoiding a sense of entitlement.
    • They discuss the role of humility in fostering healthy relationships and creating a more positive and respectful environment.
  15. The Nature of Reality and Simulation Theory:
    • Joe and Bert delve into the philosophical concept of simulation theory, questioning the nature of reality and the possibility that our universe is a simulated environment.
    • They explore the idea that our perception of reality may be influenced by external forces, highlighting the potential for manipulation and control.
    • The conversation touches on the idea of synchronicity, the phenomenon of meaningful coincidences, and the potential for the universe to send us messages.
    • They humorously discuss the implications of simulation theory and its potential to challenge our understanding of existence.
  16. The Power of Podcasts and Online Communities:
    • Joe and Bert discuss the impact of podcasts and online communities in fostering connections and promoting shared interests.
    • They highlight the unique nature of podcasting as a platform for authentic conversation and the creation of organic networks among listeners and creators.
    • The conversation touches on the importance of building community and the role of podcasts in connecting individuals with shared passions and ideas.
    • They discuss the potential for podcasts to influence listeners and inspire personal growth and development.
  17. The Role of Psychedelics and Altered States of Consciousness:
    • Joe and Bert discuss the potential benefits and risks of psychedelics, exploring the idea of altering states of consciousness as a means of personal growth and spiritual exploration.
    • They challenge traditional negative perceptions of psychedelics, emphasizing their potential to facilitate introspection and enhance creativity.
    • The conversation touches on the cultural stigma surrounding psychedelics and the need for open and honest dialogue about their potential benefits and risks.
    • They discuss the importance of responsible use and the potential for psychedelics to be used as a tool for healing and self-discovery.
  18. The Importance of Finding Your Tribe:
    • Joe and Bert discuss the importance of finding your tribe, emphasizing the value of surrounding yourself with people who share your values and support your goals.
    • They highlight the power of positive relationships and the importance of fostering an environment of mutual respect and understanding.
    • The conversation touches on the challenges of navigating social dynamics and the need to be selective about the people you choose to spend time with.
    • They emphasize the importance of creating a positive and supportive network that can enhance personal growth and well-being.
  19. The Onnit Compound Vision:
    • Joe and Bert outline their vision for the Onnit Compound, a future self-sustaining community based on their shared values of health, wellness, and personal growth.
    • They discuss the compound’s potential to foster a sense of community and provide a space for individuals to pursue their passions and live authentically.
    • The conversation touches on the importance of sustainability and the compound’s potential to create a model for a more ethical and responsible way of living.
    • They humorously envision a future where the Onnit Compound becomes a self-sufficient utopia, complete with its own unique traditions and values.
  20. The Future of Entertainment and Media:
    • Joe and Bert discuss the evolving landscape of entertainment and media, highlighting the rise of podcasts, online content, and the decline of traditional television.
    • They speculate about the future of media and the potential for new and innovative platforms to emerge.
    • The conversation touches on the increasing importance of authenticity and direct connection between creators and audiences.
    • They discuss the challenges and opportunities presented by the changing media landscape and the potential for greater creative freedom and control.
  21. The Importance of Respect and Avoiding Conflict:
    • Joe and Bert emphasize the importance of respectful communication and conflict avoidance, highlighting the power of empathy and understanding in fostering positive relationships.
    • They discuss the dangers of engaging in negativity and the importance of choosing your battles wisely.
    • The conversation touches on the role of social media in amplifying negativity and the importance of maintaining a positive online presence.
    • They encourage listeners to approach disagreements with kindness and a willingness to listen and learn, emphasizing the importance of building bridges rather than walls.
  22. The Importance of Finding Your Voice and Expressing Yourself Authentically:
    • Joe and Bert discuss the importance of finding your voice and expressing yourself authentically, encouraging listeners to embrace their individuality and pursue their passions.
    • They emphasize the power of creativity and the importance of finding outlets for self-expression, whether it be through art, music, writing, or other forms of creative endeavors.
    • The conversation touches on the importance of authenticity and the need to be true to yourself, even in the face of societal pressures and expectations.
    • They discuss the role of creativity in personal growth and the importance of allowing your individuality to shine through.
  23. The Importance of Taking Action and Embracing Challenges:
    • Joe and Bert encourage listeners to take action and embrace challenges, highlighting the importance of stepping outside of their comfort zones and pursuing their goals.
    • They discuss the dangers of procrastination and the need to be proactive in shaping their own destinies.
    • The conversation touches on the importance of resilience and the ability to bounce back from setbacks, emphasizing the need to learn from mistakes and keep moving forward.
    • They encourage listeners to believe in themselves and their potential, emphasizing the importance of taking risks and embracing the unknown.
  24. The Importance of Finding Humor in Life’s Challenges:
    • Joe and Bert discuss the importance of finding humor in life’s challenges, highlighting the power of laughter in coping with adversity and maintaining a positive outlook.
    • They share stories about how humor has helped them navigate difficult times, emphasizing the importance of finding joy and lightness even in the face of hardship.
    • The conversation touches on the importance of perspective and the ability to see the funny side of life’s challenges.
    • They encourage listeners to embrace their inner comedian and find ways to inject laughter into their lives.

Memorable Quotes

  • “Why do you have the highest DSL you can get? The highest DSL can suck it. Right.” – Bert Kreischer expresses his frustration with slow internet speeds.
  • “You gotta earn that shit. You gotta earn that shit. No. That’s what I think.” – Joe Rogan’s philosophy on enjoying unhealthy foods.
  • “You’re happy. That’s how we all should be if we can maintain it. That’s what I’m saying. Right? We gotta maintain it.” – Bert Kreischer’s musings on the ideal state of happiness.
  • “Every guy believes that Lesbians are only lesbians because they ain’t got a visa this week. That’s what I’m saying. Fuck.” – Bert Kreischer’s humorous take on lesbian relationships.
  • “If you wanna be with a chick, you better be technical and just be real gentle with how you hit them. I don’t think I could ever spar with a chick.” – Joe Rogan’s perspective on sparring with women in MMA.


 

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